“I Give You Permission to Fail” — the Key to Equality at Home

When Zach Watson joined us on Equal-ish, he showed up with a message every parent needs to hear: “I give you permission to fail.”

It’s such a simple idea, but wow, it hit hard. Because here’s the thing: we’re great at telling our kids to “learn from mistakes.” But with our partners? Not so much. Forgetting school lunches, missing a pickup, leaving the bathroom half-cleaned… these moments can spiral into criticism and resentment.

Zach’s point? Give each other (and yourself) grace. That’s how we grow.

Here are a few other takeaways we loved from our chat:

Real language beats “therapy speak”

Forget the over-scripted lines. Try this instead: “What can I do to help you today?” It’s simple, genuine, and creates connection without drama.

Make the invisible visible

Zach swears by his weekly “boring meeting” with his wife — a quick check-in to share what’s on your mind, line up diaries, and reduce the “you never told me that!” tension. Spoiler: it’s not boring. It’s relationship-saving.

Why motivation matters

When men step up at home, everyone wins:

• Your partner feels less alone.

• Your relationship gets stronger (yes, intimacy too).

• Your kids grow up seeing you as an equal parent.

Find your people

Equality at home is hard work. The good news? You don’t have to do it alone. Follow creators, join communities, listen to podcasts (like Equal-ish 😉) that keep the conversation going and remind you—you’re not the only ones figuring this out.

At the end of the day, it’s not about perfection. It’s about progress, connection, and forgiving each other when things don’t go as planned.

🎧 Dive into the full episode with Zach Watson here.